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At the TMA Annual Myositis Conference in Las Vegas, I attended a
wonderful seminar entitled "Living Well with Chronic Illness", put on by
clinical psychologist Laury Goolsby. It was there that I was introduced
to a new term describing the care giving relationship. That term was
"Care Partners". To me this better represents a sharing and an
understanding that care giving is not a one way street but that it
involves much more. It is the emotions, issues and commitments that both
individuals not only share but also may have, see & feel differently.
Many of these issues and emotions of the "care giving"
partner will be the same things the ill or "recipient partner" is
thinking about and dealing with, but they often are seen from
different prospective.
For the care giving partner it is a much more realistic and
compassionate term for those unselfish individuals who do so much to
help out the one they love who is sick with a chronic and often
debilitating illness. It acknowledges that the person who helps care
for a partner also has their own needs and feelings and those
things need to be recognized by all involved and in turn be dealt with.
On the other hand it also recognizes that the other partner, the one
receiving the care is not helpless and has not become their illness.
They are not less worthy or less of a person. It accepts the fact that
they are a thinking, spiritual, loving and caring partner that can give
back emotionally to others
and can also contribute to a situation or event,
in other ways,
even if they can not do the things physically they were once able to do.
I would like to salute all the care
giving partners and in doing so try to provide some resources and
encouragement to help with their difficult and sometimes unseeingly
unrecognized or unappreciated efforts.
Websites of Interest
National Alliance for Caregiving
www.caregiving.org
Jim
Kilpatrick's website has a specific Caregivers Discussion Bulletin
Board Forum - where you can post questions, thoughts or information
and read what others have posted.
www.myositissupportgroup.org/discussion.htm
Family Caregivers Support Network
www.familycaregivers.org
Books
The
Caregivers Handbook
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